“I want to write beautiful, honest words that make women gasp in recognition.” Mission accomplished! I love your writing and am so encouraged by it.
I keep going back and forth about my social media accounts. I’m going to take January off and see what comes. I have taken more breaks from it in the past year than ever, and when I came back last time, I did ask myself, “Why am I really here?” And even though I want to encourage people and be one of those nice, inspiring IG accounts, the reality is I don’t want to put time into that when I could be writing on here. And so I just share memes and reels and scroll, scroll, scroll. But I am still afraid of actually pulling the plug. I guess I need to really dig into what I’m so scared of.
Oh wow, thank you so much Erin!! I found the shift away from constant social media pretty jarring. It took a while to re-adjust and in the meantime I felt bored and angry and sad, all the stuff that socials masked for me. I still miss the memes! But in the long-run it was better - I got space to think and it forced me to be more intentional with my friends to connect one on one, text, or voice chat. It also got me writing because I was bored. Even with Substack I've had to be careful and now I only check it on my laptop as it is too easy to scroll and scroll.
Rebecca, I don't know that our ages make a difference, there's just something inherently unnerving about the makeup of Instagram and the lie that says we need to be there to widen the reach of our work. I officially signed off in April of this year after finding this particular podcast that a friend text it to me. I ended up being invited back as a guest to explain my process, you might find it inspirational as well as informative if you need a nudge...
Thanks for reading Jody! I've been off for six years now, and I think what unnerved me was feeling like I needed to hustle and promote my Substack, and that was what got me back to Instagram for the briefest foray. I read your article below and so encouraged to hear that the platform is not actually that helpful in selling books. I've heard similar for conversion to poetry newsletters. It's honestly a relief.
Ah yes I hear you. It is a relief, and I am happy in the few months that I've been here on Substack to find so many other poets. Yay. It's a pleasure to meet you.
So fun to find another poet! Check out the Part-Time Poets Substack. It's a beautiful bunch of women I write poetry with - we send out a collection every month 💛
Hi Erin! Leaving Instagram is a consideration as writers, but I think it can be done. I finally pulled the plug in April of this year, and wrote about it here on Substack in October. You might find the nudge you need to do the same as God leads you. https://jodycollins.substack.com/p/my-long-goodbye-to-instagram
Ugh I feel this. I’ve been off IG for months now and every time I even check it on my lap top it makes me feel not good. So I’m here with you slowly plodding along. And writing!
"God did not tell me to hustle, promote, and expand at all costs. He gave me a love of words. He told me to tend and grow what he has given. He asked me to be willing to serve with my words, no matter how many women read."
YEP -- I was only on instagram to post that I had a new newsletter (That I'd been doing every week for years! Whoever wanted to subscribe would have by now! lol)
In the end I realized the purpose of my newsletter was to CULTIVATE long-form thinking. Instagram did not serve that purpose, or encourage it. Thanks for writing this.
Thank you so much!! It is so encouraging to hear that from you as a long-term writer as a beginner writer as I really felt terrible that I was not on Instagram. I felt so guilty, like if I was serious about it, I should be trying to promote it.
I did not realise how much work was involved to be famous on Instagram. I was shocked in my one foray into Google how much they need to do to keep ahead of the algorithm. I was devastated - all I want to do is write - but if they can do pretty pictures and inspiring captions, go them!
Thank you for your honesty. This is so relatable. I honestly think that all of the noise of “HAVING to promote yourself “ and “brand yourself” on social media has kept me from writing. And I think the writing is actually a gift that God has given me to enjoy. So ridiculous. But the struggle is real! Again, thank you for sharing your heart. I look forward to reading more of your work here!
SO good and so relatable!!! I felt the exact same way after getting back on Instagram after taking most of the year off: “Opening up the Instagram feed felt like a screaming fire alarm. It felt too loud, too garish, too much.” Thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience with us ❤️
Oh wow, thank you so much Megan. I'm glad I'm not the only one who struggles with the platform - it just aggravates envy for me, which I'm learning I'm prone to. Sigh.
When I look at Insta as a promotion tool for my books that's when I really feel awful about it. I was sure I was going to go off it for good, but a random snowstorm hit when I was mucking my barn. It was so pretty that I posted it on reels and got over 5 million views and 9000 new followers. LOL. Now I have people hoping for storms and probably not all that interested in buying my books. I do enjoy creating and sharing little reels which I think I'll continue to do when the mood strikes, but I'm not going to waste time fretting over algorithms and reach anymore. I think we can beat ourselves up about being on Instagram or not being on it (there's peer pressure on both sides). There's also a danger in chasing a time in the past that seemed so much better and trying to recreate a world of zero technology (even as we write on Substack. Artists need to find spaces they're comfortable with but should never fully retreat from the world.
Thanks Adrienne for this nuanced view! I'm grateful for the tech that is available to me these days, Substack is wonderful, and Facebook I use in a limited way for a writing group. I definitely don't want to retreat, but I feel like Instagram just aggravates envy for me, which I'm prone to, and it was a relief to realise that I don't have to be there. I'm so glad you enjoy your time on the platform!
I definitely struggle with the envy thing too on instagram. Still trying to figure out a balance and I may still leave it. In so many ways though I feel like good and talented voices end up retreating from the public square leaving only popcorn and cheesy stuff where most people go. I want truth, goodness and beauty to infiltrate every corner but I totally understand how hard it is keeping your sanity on these platforms!
Yeah I hear that. I think it's not a cut and dry thing, if you can use it well or are able to use boundaries - like Ashlee Gadd uses a one week on, one week off approach that sounds lovely. I just can't seem to pull that one off myself. It's easier for me to not be there and invest all my energies into one platform. If you're able to share truth, goodness, and beauty there - go you! That's a wonderful ministry 💛
It’s worth mentioning that the Meta Business Suite app does eliminate a lot of the issues you’re describing as there’s no newsfeed/scrolling through another people’s content - just access to your own ‘business’ page/insta account to create/manage your own content and respond to messages/comments directed to you. Totally okay to not promote stuff via social media though! It does take a bit of energy…
I hear this, clear as a bell. I've taken breaks from Instagram and Facebook ranging anywhere from a week to nine months, but I've committed myself to being off this entire calendar year and already I just --- never want to return, ever again.
Substack has become quite the respite for me since I began "plodding" here in September. In many ways, I'm still learning to find the safest, best pockets for me in this space. The pockets where writers are writing about things that move my heart, my mind, and my soul. For a time, I found myself wandering through what felt like a hall of mirrors where I was finding subs writing a lot about growing on Substack and I felt that creeping, clamoring comparison inside of me to do the things other social medium have trained a whole generation of people to do.
I'm here because I missed longform writing, missed connecting with writers and readers actually writing and reading, not mindlessly scrolling and moving on to the very next thing, or pandering to the masses with catchy, overdubbed videos.
Oh I love this. Thanks for sharing! I also found some newsletters about growing on Substack but you're right, it just made me feel icky. I love to read here, write here, I love hanging out in the comments section, and seeing my writer friends grow and write and share. That's on the money that it is about curating what want to see. And I want to see writing about beauty and truth 💛
Ugh, yes. This is SO good and so relatable. I just started a new rhythm of only downloading/posting on Instagram one day a week, and it’s been so freeing. On top of all the awful things scrolling was doing to my mental health, I realized the pressure to *promote* my work was distracting me from actually *doing* the work and having the mental space to get inspired. Thank you for this!! Agree 100%.
This is so great to hear. Thanks for your kind words and sharing. I honestly thought when I posted this that I was the only weirdo not on Instagram, and that it was only me who found it hard. I was not expecting this piece to blow up in the way it has, but it has been wonderfully encouraging that so many of us struggle with the comparison and pressure to promote. Look forward to reading your work!
If I were reading this on Kindle, I'd have highlighted half of it.
Ok, for the questions:
1. What are the most encouraging spaces you know online?
-Schole' Sistership
-Convivial Circle
-Substack
2. Who are the women who encourage you most in your real, everyday life? Why?
Two ladies from church. They cut through the expectations and want to know what's really going on and be there for me.
3. In what areas of your life do you need to fight for joy?
Gratitude for my daily grind, the repetition of being a homemaker, not taking it for granted. Gratitude for all that I've been given, for freedom, comfort, a family, health, free time.
4. What practices have you put in place to fight comparison?
Like you, no "Big" social media since 2018. I've learned a lot of helpful tips from Convivial Circle, like reading alignment cards every morning and doing brain dumps and daily cards. Those terms are a bit jargony, so people can learn what those are here: https://simplyconvivial.com/homemaking-101/
Thank you so much Catie! And thank you for these thoughtful answers. So glad to hear to hear you have found encouraging spaces online and in person. I certainly need to fight for joy in the daily grind, so good that you are too! 💛
“All of a sudden, I feel smaller and shabbier in my own life, flanked by tissues, a half-eaten apple, and an array of medicines.” - too frequently this is my feeling after too much time on social media. Thanks for putting words to the feeling!
“I want to write beautiful, honest words that make women gasp in recognition.” Mission accomplished! I love your writing and am so encouraged by it.
I keep going back and forth about my social media accounts. I’m going to take January off and see what comes. I have taken more breaks from it in the past year than ever, and when I came back last time, I did ask myself, “Why am I really here?” And even though I want to encourage people and be one of those nice, inspiring IG accounts, the reality is I don’t want to put time into that when I could be writing on here. And so I just share memes and reels and scroll, scroll, scroll. But I am still afraid of actually pulling the plug. I guess I need to really dig into what I’m so scared of.
Oh wow, thank you so much Erin!! I found the shift away from constant social media pretty jarring. It took a while to re-adjust and in the meantime I felt bored and angry and sad, all the stuff that socials masked for me. I still miss the memes! But in the long-run it was better - I got space to think and it forced me to be more intentional with my friends to connect one on one, text, or voice chat. It also got me writing because I was bored. Even with Substack I've had to be careful and now I only check it on my laptop as it is too easy to scroll and scroll.
Rebecca, I don't know that our ages make a difference, there's just something inherently unnerving about the makeup of Instagram and the lie that says we need to be there to widen the reach of our work. I officially signed off in April of this year after finding this particular podcast that a friend text it to me. I ended up being invited back as a guest to explain my process, you might find it inspirational as well as informative if you need a nudge...
https://writingoffsocial.com/24-2/
Thanks for reading Jody! I've been off for six years now, and I think what unnerved me was feeling like I needed to hustle and promote my Substack, and that was what got me back to Instagram for the briefest foray. I read your article below and so encouraged to hear that the platform is not actually that helpful in selling books. I've heard similar for conversion to poetry newsletters. It's honestly a relief.
Ah yes I hear you. It is a relief, and I am happy in the few months that I've been here on Substack to find so many other poets. Yay. It's a pleasure to meet you.
So fun to find another poet! Check out the Part-Time Poets Substack. It's a beautiful bunch of women I write poetry with - we send out a collection every month 💛
((that's where I first found you.... I follow Ashlee Gadd and think it was via that rabbit trail.))
Cheers!
Hi Erin! Leaving Instagram is a consideration as writers, but I think it can be done. I finally pulled the plug in April of this year, and wrote about it here on Substack in October. You might find the nudge you need to do the same as God leads you. https://jodycollins.substack.com/p/my-long-goodbye-to-instagram
Ugh I feel this. I’ve been off IG for months now and every time I even check it on my lap top it makes me feel not good. So I’m here with you slowly plodding along. And writing!
Thanks Kim! So glad to hear it's not just me 💛
"God did not tell me to hustle, promote, and expand at all costs. He gave me a love of words. He told me to tend and grow what he has given. He asked me to be willing to serve with my words, no matter how many women read."
YEP -- I was only on instagram to post that I had a new newsletter (That I'd been doing every week for years! Whoever wanted to subscribe would have by now! lol)
In the end I realized the purpose of my newsletter was to CULTIVATE long-form thinking. Instagram did not serve that purpose, or encourage it. Thanks for writing this.
Thank you so much!! It is so encouraging to hear that from you as a long-term writer as a beginner writer as I really felt terrible that I was not on Instagram. I felt so guilty, like if I was serious about it, I should be trying to promote it.
Yep, I just go back to concept that "the medium *is* the message".
Promoting long-form writing on a platfom built on fostering the opposite just felt futile.
I love that. You're right. I love Substack because I love long-form!
I resonated with these exact words!
I hated Instagram because so many women I know would say, "I blog on Instagram".
A caption on a photograph, even a really long caption, is not a blog post. That drove me nuts. It's not even the same sort of online skill set.
Hahahaha yep.
I was once talking to a girl who had met up with this Instagram famous person for a playdate. "She has a ton of followers."
Me: "Oh, cool. So what does she do, like have a blog or newsletter or website or something?"
"No, just.... Instagram."
*finds it later, finds pretty pictures with inspiring captions for homestead moms*
*decides I'll stick with reading long-form writing*
I did not realise how much work was involved to be famous on Instagram. I was shocked in my one foray into Google how much they need to do to keep ahead of the algorithm. I was devastated - all I want to do is write - but if they can do pretty pictures and inspiring captions, go them!
Thank you for your honesty. This is so relatable. I honestly think that all of the noise of “HAVING to promote yourself “ and “brand yourself” on social media has kept me from writing. And I think the writing is actually a gift that God has given me to enjoy. So ridiculous. But the struggle is real! Again, thank you for sharing your heart. I look forward to reading more of your work here!
Thank you so much Jayna, glad to hear it was encouraging for you! The struggle is real haha but I hope that you can enjoy playing with words 💛💛
SO good and so relatable!!! I felt the exact same way after getting back on Instagram after taking most of the year off: “Opening up the Instagram feed felt like a screaming fire alarm. It felt too loud, too garish, too much.” Thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience with us ❤️
Oh wow, thank you so much Megan. I'm glad I'm not the only one who struggles with the platform - it just aggravates envy for me, which I'm learning I'm prone to. Sigh.
When I look at Insta as a promotion tool for my books that's when I really feel awful about it. I was sure I was going to go off it for good, but a random snowstorm hit when I was mucking my barn. It was so pretty that I posted it on reels and got over 5 million views and 9000 new followers. LOL. Now I have people hoping for storms and probably not all that interested in buying my books. I do enjoy creating and sharing little reels which I think I'll continue to do when the mood strikes, but I'm not going to waste time fretting over algorithms and reach anymore. I think we can beat ourselves up about being on Instagram or not being on it (there's peer pressure on both sides). There's also a danger in chasing a time in the past that seemed so much better and trying to recreate a world of zero technology (even as we write on Substack. Artists need to find spaces they're comfortable with but should never fully retreat from the world.
Thanks Adrienne for this nuanced view! I'm grateful for the tech that is available to me these days, Substack is wonderful, and Facebook I use in a limited way for a writing group. I definitely don't want to retreat, but I feel like Instagram just aggravates envy for me, which I'm prone to, and it was a relief to realise that I don't have to be there. I'm so glad you enjoy your time on the platform!
I definitely struggle with the envy thing too on instagram. Still trying to figure out a balance and I may still leave it. In so many ways though I feel like good and talented voices end up retreating from the public square leaving only popcorn and cheesy stuff where most people go. I want truth, goodness and beauty to infiltrate every corner but I totally understand how hard it is keeping your sanity on these platforms!
Yeah I hear that. I think it's not a cut and dry thing, if you can use it well or are able to use boundaries - like Ashlee Gadd uses a one week on, one week off approach that sounds lovely. I just can't seem to pull that one off myself. It's easier for me to not be there and invest all my energies into one platform. If you're able to share truth, goodness, and beauty there - go you! That's a wonderful ministry 💛
I love this Bec xx
It’s worth mentioning that the Meta Business Suite app does eliminate a lot of the issues you’re describing as there’s no newsfeed/scrolling through another people’s content - just access to your own ‘business’ page/insta account to create/manage your own content and respond to messages/comments directed to you. Totally okay to not promote stuff via social media though! It does take a bit of energy…
this is such good intel!! thank you.
Thanks Hannah - I definitely wasn't aware of the Meta Business Suite 😅💛
I really resonate with this Bec! The idea that I will one day write here just for the joy of it. I love your writing so don't change!
Thanks Kym, really appreciate your kind words. I look forward to the day when your photos and words are on here too, just for the joy of it.
Can't wait! 🙌🏻
Did I write this? 😆 So relatable, Bec!!
Hahah thanks Stacy! 💛
So so so good!!! I’m here for the writing!❤️
Thank you!! 💛
Love this Bec! “Then it hits me. I don’t have to be here.” Such a great reminder. ❤️
Thanks Sledge! 💛💛💛
I hear this, clear as a bell. I've taken breaks from Instagram and Facebook ranging anywhere from a week to nine months, but I've committed myself to being off this entire calendar year and already I just --- never want to return, ever again.
Substack has become quite the respite for me since I began "plodding" here in September. In many ways, I'm still learning to find the safest, best pockets for me in this space. The pockets where writers are writing about things that move my heart, my mind, and my soul. For a time, I found myself wandering through what felt like a hall of mirrors where I was finding subs writing a lot about growing on Substack and I felt that creeping, clamoring comparison inside of me to do the things other social medium have trained a whole generation of people to do.
I'm here because I missed longform writing, missed connecting with writers and readers actually writing and reading, not mindlessly scrolling and moving on to the very next thing, or pandering to the masses with catchy, overdubbed videos.
I'm *so* glad to be here.
Oh I love this. Thanks for sharing! I also found some newsletters about growing on Substack but you're right, it just made me feel icky. I love to read here, write here, I love hanging out in the comments section, and seeing my writer friends grow and write and share. That's on the money that it is about curating what want to see. And I want to see writing about beauty and truth 💛
Ugh, yes. This is SO good and so relatable. I just started a new rhythm of only downloading/posting on Instagram one day a week, and it’s been so freeing. On top of all the awful things scrolling was doing to my mental health, I realized the pressure to *promote* my work was distracting me from actually *doing* the work and having the mental space to get inspired. Thank you for this!! Agree 100%.
This is so great to hear. Thanks for your kind words and sharing. I honestly thought when I posted this that I was the only weirdo not on Instagram, and that it was only me who found it hard. I was not expecting this piece to blow up in the way it has, but it has been wonderfully encouraging that so many of us struggle with the comparison and pressure to promote. Look forward to reading your work!
THANK YOU FOR THIS!
It's gold!
If I were reading this on Kindle, I'd have highlighted half of it.
Ok, for the questions:
1. What are the most encouraging spaces you know online?
-Schole' Sistership
-Convivial Circle
-Substack
2. Who are the women who encourage you most in your real, everyday life? Why?
Two ladies from church. They cut through the expectations and want to know what's really going on and be there for me.
3. In what areas of your life do you need to fight for joy?
Gratitude for my daily grind, the repetition of being a homemaker, not taking it for granted. Gratitude for all that I've been given, for freedom, comfort, a family, health, free time.
4. What practices have you put in place to fight comparison?
Like you, no "Big" social media since 2018. I've learned a lot of helpful tips from Convivial Circle, like reading alignment cards every morning and doing brain dumps and daily cards. Those terms are a bit jargony, so people can learn what those are here: https://simplyconvivial.com/homemaking-101/
Thank you so much Catie! And thank you for these thoughtful answers. So glad to hear to hear you have found encouraging spaces online and in person. I certainly need to fight for joy in the daily grind, so good that you are too! 💛
“All of a sudden, I feel smaller and shabbier in my own life, flanked by tissues, a half-eaten apple, and an array of medicines.” - too frequently this is my feeling after too much time on social media. Thanks for putting words to the feeling!
Oh this makes me so happy to be giving you words for a feeling! 💛