What Discontent Says
Poetry Collection No. 3 and what I am reading and eating in September
Hey friend,
This is my third poetry collection. I always feel so awkward sending poems out into the world, but the kind words that land in the comments section, my texts, and emails, have been so encouraging. The common thread for this collection seems to be things said and unsaid.
I. Lost - a meditation on things lost and gained in motherhood.
II. No Words Here, Only Glory - thinking about silence and the ministry of holding my tongue.
III. What Discontent Says - What Children Say by Kate Baer is one of my favourite poems of all time. I’ve been reading a book by a Puritan guy called Jeremiah Burroughs. I can only read The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment a chapter at a time because there’s so much good stuff to process. His chapter on Excuses of a Discontent Heart made me laugh and I realised it sounded a lot like What Children Say, so I hope you enjoy the Baer feat. Burroughs remix.
Photo by Rickie-Tom Schünemann on Pexels.
Lost
I lost that word, where did it go?
It scatters out of my tired brain,
like little scrapings of apple,
smushed popcorn
out of my son’s mouth,
coming to rest in the crevices of the car seat.
I lost my purse, where did it go?
It tumbled out of my mind,
abandoned on the air hockey table,
while I walk out of the arcade,
grubby little hands entwined in mine.
I lost my heart, where did it go?
On the side table between my sons’ beds,
watching them while they sleep.
No words here, only glory.
The ministry of holding my tongue
is surprisingly hard to do.
I think about descending into the depths,
where undisturbed the water sleeps.
Motionless sand in unbroken quiet,
in the silent palace of the sea.
No words here, only glory.
I think about caesura, breaks
in music, hearts waiting.
No words here, only glory.
Small, sleeping bodies,
Chests rising and falling.
No words here, only glory.
What might God do
with this glorious quiet?
What Discontent Says
I can’t bear this, I won’t bear this,
I’d never murmur in a million years.
I’m not grumbling but I don’t have
what she has. I wouldn’t grumble if
I could see God’s plan. They are
unreasonable. I never looked
for this. I never thought it would
happen to me. You don’t know
how I feel. I will never move up
off this floor. You couldn’t be
content if this happened to you.
Well, it’s worse than your problem.
I’d be content if it was any other
problem. God has left me. I am no
help to anyone now. I worked hard
and it’s gone. Don’t be angry.
Don’t give me advice. Don’t start
singing. Don’t leave me all alone.
Actually, I’m not alone. He was
always here. He’s more beautiful
than I thought. He didn’t deserve
his suffering. He’s so kind to me.
I didn’t realise I hurt him so. All
I deserve is death. I can’t believe
his mercy. Maybe I can bear it.
I’m Loving
Gethsemane by Mary Oliver is my favourite poem of hers. Closely followed by I Worried.
Same with The Raincoat by Ada Limon.
This is so beautiful it made me teary.
Something I’ve been pondering. Keen to discuss!
I’ve been on a run of poetry this month with Good Bones by Maggie Smith, Felicity by Mary Oliver, A Taste of River Water by Cate Kennedy, and A Thousand Mornings by Mary Oliver. Strongly recommend all of them.
I’m re-reading Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, which is slim but packs a punch. This is a book to read deeply.
I’m slowly making my way through Spurgeon’s Treasury of the Psalms, one psalm a day. He has a devotional reading for each psalm. I skip everything else. It is rich and deep and poetic and beautiful. I cannot sing the praises of this enough, even if it is in teeny tiny text. However, if you are deep in toddler and new baby trenches, I would NOT even think about it. Poor Bishop Hooper recorded a song for each Psalm and they are beautiful (start with Psalm 23). Or Tim Keller’s My Rock My Refuge one page daily devotional in the Psalms. Spending time in the Psalms is teaching me to pray and be honest with God.
Finally, Wednesday Soup Night is still going strong in our household. Tomato and Roasted Red Capsicum Soup was a hit with mozzarella cheese toasties and my beloved broccoli. Trust me on this: put Hellman’s Mayo on the outside of your toastie before you toast it. It makes a salty and crispy finish that is just impossible with butter. Then you dunk it into this quick and easy soup and praise God for melted things.
Something I Made
out with a needle from underneath ribs.
They make a satisfying plink in my jar.
Thank you so much to everyone who has shared The Sunday Morning Snuggle with friends, it absolutely blows me away that women read this. It is the delight of my days to write for you guys.
If you’ve enjoyed reading The Sunday Morning Snuggle, would you please consider forwarding the email to a friend who might like to read it?
Thank you so much again for reading. I really, really appreciate it.
PS. *No words here, only glory was inspired by two things. First, this quote from Charles Haddon Spurgeon:
“Descend, if you will, into the lowest depths of the ocean, where undisturbed the water sleeps, and the very sand is motionless in unbroken quiet, but the glory of the Lord is there, revealing its excellence in the silent palace of the sea,” Spurgeon’s Treasury of David, p. 89
And, 2. The phrase “the ministry of holding my tongue,” comes from Dietrich Bonhoeffer in Life Together p. 92
Ah discontent - such a familiar struggle so the poem was very relatable! Love your poetry!
Also thanks for all the recommends, especially the poetry books. I really want to start reading more poetry so those might be a good start! ✨
Love these poems, especially the one about discontent. Thank you for sharing them!
And Spurgeon had such a way with words, didn’t he? A poet in his own right.